Post by R. Devane on Mar 11, 2014 21:55:13 GMT
This forum has been slow lately so I thought I’d write a short blog about contentment. I’m not trying to appear to be like a Buddhist monk. These are simply my thoughts and philosophies that continue to be a work in progress. They are true for martial arts training or indeed any area of life.
Why is the grass always greener on the other side? Is it actually possible to be happy with your ‘lot’. Should we ever stop striving for more? Goal setting is important but there are problems with goals. Why do goals take a hell of a lot longer to happen than you planned? It can be so frustrating. When they do happen sometimes the results aren’t as large or as good as you imagined. January is a perfect example. Everyone wants to lose weight but the majority fail and probably only get their act together closer to the summer. Then instead of the 20 pounds they wanted to lose it turned out to be more like 10. It can be anything; money, relationships, study, business, sport, hobby, World domination! – any goal or plan.
One thing that is totally destructive when setting out your plans is to compare yourself to others. Sometimes you’ll appear to be doing better than certain people and against others you won’t but your goals will become less about yourself and more about others. You don’t have control of your goals if they are not your goals! Goals are the difference between wishing and planning. One thing is for certain, you will achieve more if you do have goals.
So, here you are, concentrating on advancing yourself (and your family) in life. Making your plans (whether materialistic or not, that’s your prerogative) and breaking them down into smaller, more achievable bite sized chunks and allowing adequate time to complete them. Next comes the part that is never really talked about. The more you do or try to do, the more failures, knock backs and haters you’ll experience. I’m convinced this is why so many people are afraid to try so many things they wish they could. Being on the firing line is never easy. When you push and strive for something you are walking into a form of warzone. It can feel like you are not meant to succeed. Mother nature, geography, health (lack of), luck (lack of), time (lack of), contacts (lack of), money (lack of), and people can all add greater challenges to your path. When I say people I am in fact talking about those who; A) already have what you have and don’t want you to have it or B) don’t have what you want and don’t want you to have it either. Unfortunately both groups often contain your ‘friends’. This is why so many of us have to keep our goals to ourselves. I often wonder if it’s more of an Irish trait. The village mentality very much exists here to this day. “Who does he/she think he/she is, trying to be better than us and have more than us! Keep him/her down!”
I think it’s very important to get the balance right. It is very important to be grateful for what you already have and have already achieved but at the same time you don’t want to be too smug and complacent or you’ll have absolutely no drive (like some rich people’s kids!). On the other hand while it’s important to strive for more achievement, there’s no point in beating yourself up over the results or failures (there will be many). Pushing yourself too hard can be a lonely and miserable road. It always comes back to that Yin Yang symbol and balancing out your life. Is there anyone out there who thinks they are the finished article? The complete and perfect martial artist? Show me that person and I’ll show you a liar and a gobshite.
Go forth and continue to learn and succeed while at the same time appreciating and making full use of what you already have (or have achieved). Okay, so maybe it’s not complete satisfaction guaranteed (does that even exist?) but it has to be better than nothing. So we’ll rename this article, ‘A modicum of satisfaction may be possible to achieve if you work very hard and if you’re lucky’. How many of you would have read this then? ha ha ha
Best wishes - Robert
Happy training..
